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Welcome to Stuff I Learned Yesterday. My name is Darrell Darnell, I almost exclusively drink Guatemalan coffee, and I believe that if you aren’t learning, you aren’t living.
In my early 20’s I lived in Texas for 3 years. There was also a guy I was associated with that had also moved to Texas from out of state. We’ll call the guy Mike. One day Mike had to go out of town for a few days for business. Apparently there was a meeting at the home office of the company he worked for. He and his wife had family there, so she traveled with him.
At the meeting, Mike was surprised to find out that he’d earned not just one bonus, but his performance numbers were good enough to earn him a second bonus! Apparently he’d not expected to qualify for any bonus at all. After the meeting he met up with his wife and shared the good news with her. As with most people, they began discussing what they would do with the money.
One of them had the idea to surprise his grandparents. His grandparents were going through a financially difficult time, and they saw the unexpected bonuses as a way to help them. They also knew that his grandparents would never accept the money from them. So they went to the bank, cashed the checks, put a few thousand dollars in an envelope, and snuck the envelope into the grandparent’s mailbox.
They then drove back to Texas not even knowing if his grandparents would get the money or if the mailman would see it and take it. Apparently the grandparents did get it, because they mentioned it to him nearly a year later. I think he was in town for the holidays and one of them randomly mentioned that his uncle had secretly put money in their mailbox. Apparently they called the uncle to thank him, but he denied knowing anything about it. They were sure he was the one that did it, but let it go. Mike never told them that he was the one that did it.
You may be wondering why Mike didn’t tell them the truth. He said that he was just trying to be obedient to what Jesus said in Matthew chapter 6. In that chapter, Jesus says, “Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven. Thus, when you give to the needy, sound no trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may be praised by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward. But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.”
Since I recommitted my life to Christ when I was 14, I’ve constantly surrounded myself with other believers and I’ve never ceased to be involved in a church. Growing up in a very small town, I primarily attended two different churches during high school. In college I regularly attended a church in the same town I worked, but when my girlfriend and I broke up, I sought out a different church from the one she was attending.
I attended that church until I got married and moved to Texas. There, I attended 2 churches. One while I lived in Lubbock, and the other while I lived in Wichita Falls. Once I moved back to Oklahoma, we found a church in our current town, and attended that church for over a decade until it dissolved. Since that time, we’ve attended the church we’re currently at.
I tell you this just to add context to my church experience. Most of the churches I’ve attended had an attendance of 100-200. Some have had attendance between 25-50. The church I’m at now has multiple campuses with attendance in the thousands. There are several hundred, perhaps a thousand, that attend our campus each week.
With all the people I’ve met in all my time in the church and all the years I spent working with mostly Christians at the bookstore, I have seen Mike’s situation play out time and time and time again. That is, people give in secret. The only reason I know enough to say I’ve seen this play out time and time and time again is I’ve been in a leadership role at many of the churches I’ve attended. I’ve led the finance committee, been worship leader, served as a deacon, and been on leadership councils.
I can confidently say that nearly all gifts and giving done by members through the church are done discreetly without any recognition. To be clear, I have no idea what any person or family tithed at any location I’ve ever attended or served. It’s really only when someone has a special need and someone else steps in to meet that need that I’ve seen those details revealed.
But not everything is hidden. What I and every member of every church I have ever attended HAS seen is what the CHURCH does with the money contributed by attendees. A church has to give an account of every penny received and spent, after all. Financial statements and budgets have to be created and approved by members. Spending statements have to be disclosed and every penny must be accounted for. What I’ve seen time and time again is churches helping people and communities.
Naturally, a larger church with more attendees will have vastly different resources than a small church of 25 people. But that small church I attended until it dissolved (which only had 25 people on a good day) was a giving church. We put together dozens of backpacks and school supplies for low-income families. We visited and baked goodies for several retirement centers around town. A couple of times per year we’d show up at every laundromat in town and pay for all the laundry on a Saturday afternoon. We gave financial contributions to a local charity for at-risk mothers. We held a community garage sale to help fund adoption for a family. We purchased, packed, and sent christmas gifts to overseas children. Those are just a few things our tiny church did for people of all ages, all colors, located in our town and towns around the world.
Our current church is very large, and I have never experienced a more giving church in all my life. We have services for various language groups. We’ve been doing prison ministry for many years. When the virus of 2020 caused us to cease meeting together, the state of Oklahoma asked us if we could fund and install the equipment necessary to broadcast our service to all 200+ prisons in our state. We did. Now that in-person ministry has resumed, we get to do both!
Our church gives gifts and supplies to students and teachers, on a similar, yet much larger scale as my previous church. Our church also has a great program called the Dollar Club. They take every single $1 bill that is received in offerings and set them aside into a special fund. Then each quarter they gather those up and present them as a check to various non-profit organizations throughout the community.
We have counseling available by genuine, licensed, qualified, care givers. We have recovery programs for those battling all types of addiction. When my mother-in-law passed away nearly 2 years ago, my father-in-law needed help. His church didn’t offer any grief counseling or classes, but ours did. He attended those classes, and late last year started a grief class at his church. We run two health clinics in Oklahoma City that allow people from the community to come and receive quality health care. All of these are available at no-cost.
All of this is just what Christians do through the church by their giving. There’s also a significant amount of giving and generosity happening through individual situations like Mike’s.
Here’s what I learned:
Why am I telling you all this? Am I bragging? NO! If you think I am, here me out. Christians and churches have a bad reputation in the eyes of many. Many see churches and preachers on TV asking for money and telling people that if they give money, God will return that seed back to them tenfold or something similar. TV preachers who tell viewers that health, wealth, and comfort can be found if they will give money are preaching a false gospel. They are not teaching the Bible accurately. In fact, they are not Christians at all. They are the types of churches that Jesus would turn the tables on just as he did the in temple in the New Testament (twice!) for very similar practices.
It seems that most people know those preachers are false, but fewer are willing to separate their brand of Christianity from authentic Christianity practiced by most churches. I don’t and won’t get political on this podcast, but I’ve heard countless times that Christains only care about life before it’s born. If you think that of Christians, I urge you to go back through this episode or read it on the website. This episode points out just a FEW of the things I’ve seen churches do first-hand for people regardless of their ethnicity, stage of life, financial status, range of sins, or creed.
Like Mike, most Christians I know give in ways that many people never see, to people who will never know, simply because they care and want to honor Christ with the way they give. If we give in such a way that draws attention to us or is known publicly, we draw criticism from non-church people. At the same time, if non-church people don’t see giving, they accuse Christians of being hypocrites or only caring about a certain type of person or group.
True Christianity loves people and historically speaking it’s been Christians in many instances that have helped the most needy and vulnerable of society. The modern hospital system was started by Christians. The abolitionist movement was started by Christians. Orphanages were started by Christians.
Churches are full of people and no person is perfect. People, even those who are Christians will cause hurt. Sometimes accidentally, sometimes completely unaware, and yes, unfortunately sometimes intentionally. I’m not saying Christians haven’t caused harm or pain. Even genuine Christians, following their sin nature, screw things up and cause pain to others.
Christians will continue to give privately and through their churches to carry out great work that cares for a great number of people. They will continue to do that mostly in secret and humbly because doing it in a way that shows off is contrary to the teachings of Christ. By the way, just because a gift is made public doesn’t mean it’s sinful. It’s all about the heart and attitude of the giver that matters.
One thing I know for certain is that God loves a cheerful giver. So let’s all look for ways we can give, help our neighbor, and be kind. Let’s assume the best in people and be slow to make assumptions that put someone in a negative light. In doing so, we’ll make our homes, churches, communities, and world, a better place.
I’m Darrell Darnell, and this has been Stuff I Learned Yesterday.
I want you to be a part of the next Monday Mailbag on July 29th! Monday Mailbag is your opportunity to Share what YOU’VE learned, so that other listeners and I can learn from YOU. It can be a message as short as 30 seconds or several minutes long. It really doesn’t matter just as long as it’s something that will benefit others. You can send in questions or responses to my SILY episodes, and I’ll respond to them via Monday Mailbag episodes. You can participate in Monday Mailbags by visiting the Golden Spiral Media listener feedback page at goldenspirlamedia.com/feedback.